I'm going to run for something I can't win. Ideally, I'll run a for a state-level house of representatives against an otherwise unopposed candidate. This resolves the question of third-party issues, since I wouldn't split the vote in our first-from-the-post system.

FWIW, in high school, I was voted "most likely to assassinate the president" in the superlatives as a write-in candidate started by some of the jocks. This, of course, was just another creative way to bully me, and fortunately the yearbook faculty supervisor wouldn't let them print it.