Amitai Schleier

Amitai Schleier at

On the first day of 7th grade French, our teacher said boys could pick any name except Hugues. She did not care for the sound.

So I picked Philippe and was a model student.

On the first day of 8th grade French, I asked for Hugues. She grudgingly agreed.

I raised my hand often.
In high school French, we got a raised eyebrow and extra credit every time we correctly used the subjunctive mood.

(A few of us rephrased nearly everything we said, to game this.)

For a group skit, I played «le chef du subjonctif». Seemed like a good guy. But in a key moment, I turned directly to the camera and admitted:

«Je ne suis pas le vrai chef du subjonctif. Mais il ne faut pas qu’on le SAIT.»


“I’m not the real master of the subjunctive. But it’s not necessary that anyone KNOWS.”

Our teacher fell out, laughing through tears.

Amitai Schleier at 2020-02-14T03:50:58Z